another ouch! a cold war, a competition you didn't know

It is so hard being the inferior of your class, specially when you are only two.

This issue has been bugging me since last week or might be ever since the school year open. I know that I'm not that smart compared to the scholar of the school,I can also be one of the top students if the number increase. This time I'm the biggest dumb-dumb of the class for two. My only classmate is only my friend and we know each other very well (that's what i think). She is a straight Dean's Lister, and a scholar of almost four institution in the country. I'm not competing with her in terms of grades 'coz i know my limit, but teacher's wanted a competition between us. in which i obviously already lost to.

I don't understand my professor very well (not in academics), when I'm able to get a higher score than my classmate, the way he always reacts is that i won a presidency election against to the best in the country by cheating! i always feel that i don't deserve what I've worked so hard for. Then I gave him the lowest score of my entire career as a student, 15/100, then the way he criticized me was the way how a bratty girl looked to a pauper. I won it 'coz i wasn't able to study 'coz my stupid-freaking classmate told me that there would no exam, that i don't have to review because she also didn't. then i trusted her to my ticket of doom... what's that for? i could just ask my self... i thought she didn't want to compete and i remembered very clear that she said she don't want to compete with anybody for many reasons like she would have pressure to bear. Does anybody includes me or not? I think i have the pressure to in the same class with her.

So far, my feelings enlightened, i have my friends who sympathises with me.

but,I swear, this would be the start of the competition she said she didn't wanted. I'm giving her and my professor my all for my best and not theirs! I might won't able to win in terms of grades, i'll show them what a good student to what a normal teenager does!